TIM BELFORD

Ah, Belinda, we hardly knew ya

Well, the shoe has dropped in Ottawa and it was a Manolo Blahnik.

Or maybe a Gucci. I don't know what she was wearing.

But when Belinda Stronach, the darling of the Conservative Set, announced she was jumping ship to the Liberals it might as well have been a Dutch wooden shoe for all the noise it made.

Not since Darth Vader announced he was Luke Skywalker's father has anything stunned Canadians in quite such a way.

Here's a woman who ditched Her role in daddy's gazillion- dollar-a-year car parts company to save the Tories, announcing she's going over to the Dark Side to save the evil empire!

And on the way she's giving up the latest love of her life, Peter "Choobacca" Mackay!

Could there be anything weirder?

Okay, let's give her the benefit of the doubt.

Belinda has suddenly discovered she's Paul Martin's love child and actually believes in fiscal conservatism and same-sex marriages.

Let`'s imagine she really doesn't think Canadians want an election on their way to the cottage.

Let's even buy the fact that she thinks that the Tories getting into bed with the Bloc Quebecois - speaking of odd marriages - is a bad thing.

Where does that leave her?

Well, she's now minister of Human Resources Canada. Which is sort of like being named Minister in charge of Leprosy.

And the way things are going, It probably means she's got an iron-clad two-week contract.

What was she thinking!

At the press conference announcing her lateral arabesque, Paul Martin, who couldn't keep quiet at the Last Supper, insisted on pointing out, several times, that one vote wouldn't necessarily save his government.

Except, as we all know, this one vote might very well save his government.

Let's face it. If Joe Bloggins, the conservative member for Buffalo Flats and the Islands had beat Belinda to the punch and announced he'd seen Lester Pearson's face in a mustard stain at McDonalds and was converting to Liberalism, Martin would have made him the Minister of Health.

Mind you, in one way it's a perfect fit.

If Belinda indeed made a mistake In joining the Tories in the first place, what better person to throw her support behind on her road to Damascus than Paul Martin, the man who many Canadians think has more possible sides than a Rubik's cube.

This woman is one to watch.