Greg Duncan

His previous columns are archived HERE.

GREG DUNCAN

Attention, All Foodies!

Out with the old, in with the new … 2005 gives way to 2006 with a whisk and medley of culinary trends.

Here are my predictions for what will be the Top Five Foods this year.

Pasta - The Atkins diet is dead and we'll see oodles of noodles back on the plate.

Slow food - Gourmet upscale prepared meals in grocery markets to take home. Coq au Vin, anyone?

Fruit - Skewers, smoothies, and exotic varieties will abound.

Fish- Fear of tainted poultry and beef lead to an increase in seafood consumption.

Middle Eastern cuisine - we've had Thai, Indian, and Chinese and yearn for Tagine and Couscous once again.

What's in and what's out

Tea is in -coffee is so yesterday - can you say Chai latte?

Quiznos is in - Subway loses market share - can you say toasted?

Out with vegetarianism - in with fruitarianism- can you say sweeeet?

Kraft Dinner is out and Presidents Choice Indian Chicken Korma is in - can you say almost spicy?

Chicken nuggets say bye-bye and Samosas wave hello - can you say cheap and tasty?

Krispy Kreme is sad - Tim Horton's is happy - can you say sugar overload?

Big Mac is out - Bigger Mac is in - can you say super size and documentary?

Baby food is out - senior food is in - can you say feed the masses?

Slow cookers are out - Fondues are in - Can you say not again and where do I put this thing?

Bam! The door slams on Emeril and the Barefoot Contessa reins supreme - Can you say Food Network?

And finally…

Food things that might have been but were better left alone in 2005

Christmas Poutine - leftover turkey, gravy and stuffing atop fries as an economic holiday treat - gather round!

Buffet Sushi - Enough said

Anchovy and Olive Chocolate Fondue

Amphibian "Jerky"

Tuna and Gherkin Brioches

"Jerk" Escargots

Chunky Margarine

Organic Mushroom Sorbet

Low Fat "eel flavor" Rice Crackers

Chili Con Petits Crapeaux

Tooth Whitening "Milk" with Fluoride

2006 Astrological Food Forecast

The exiting culinary moon enters Narnia, and planetary forces cause sugar, caffeine, and crabs to navigate Uranus.

Saturn's' spiritual digestion revolves around moody late night snacks resulting in a period of denial for all signs. Over indulgence reeks havoc on Ying and Yang life balance and hampers mayonnaise tolerance while emphasizing spiciness.

The new moon will bring relief in the form of exercise and careful diet control while slow cookers give way to toaster ovens throughout the year.